I have taken some time between part 1 and 2 of the acrostic regarding adoptions. I didn't want the words to start sounding the same. It is easy to say the same thing over and over with a new letter. As the stories keep rolling through my brain I want them to be fresh and new for this second part so here we go...
T. Trust - Ultimately you have to trust that God has all things worked out to His satisfaction or you wouldn't ever begin the process of adoption. With so many unknowns in the process trust is key to survival and proper perspective. However, under the umbrella of trust of God for all the details you end up learning to trust other people as well. The trust between yourself and the birth family starts to build from the first moment that you meet them. This is the process that is filled with the most lack of trust in the entire adoption. Each party at the beginning will question the other party's motives, understandings, reasons, intentions and everything imaginable. It is beautiful to see these lack of trust items turn into trust items one by one. The process happened with both Patrick's and Eliana's birth families and I am sure that similar trust is built in most adoption situations. If you recognize that this is normal (and even healthy) then you will have an easier time navigating through the process as you experience it.
S - Sacrifice - The sacrifice of having a child (biologically) is one of putting yourself last and putting your child first. They eat before you; they bathe before you; they have their needs met before yours, etc. It is a natural outgrowth of parenthood and you can talk to any new Mom or Dad and get all of the details. This reality is equally true in the adoptive process. Everything in the process seems to happen on its own time schedule which can be inconvenient and frustrating at times. Nothing about the process of meeting the birth family will happen on your schedule. Nothing will prepare you for unexpected expenses (unless you happen to be independently wealthy!) When you keep the focus on knowing that sacrifice will is the norm then the process will be much easier to understand.
Not one of the letters that were described in these 2 articles "A.D.O.P.T.I.O.N.S." describes the process, emotions, or ups and downs completely. You must take all of the discussions in the articles and keep reminding yourself that it is not about you, it is about the child. More importantly it is not about your plan, it is about God's plan for you. This will keep your adoption in the proper focus and give you the strength to make it through. The joy at the end of the process is indescribable.
Thanks for reading. I pray that these 2 articles have encouraged other couples in their process of adoption.